Friday, January 31, 2020
Nursing Diagnosis Handbook Essay Example for Free
Nursing Diagnosis Handbook Essay ââ¬Å"It isnââ¬â¢t fair. Iââ¬â¢ve worked so hard all my life, I donââ¬â¢t deserve this,â⬠thought Mrs. Ross as she looked down at her right leg where a large wound gaped open. Two weeks ago, she had a femoral-popliteal bypass, which got infected. The wound was opened up and was healing slowly by secondary intention. It was painful, raw, and frightening. She put a hand on her chest and raised the head of the bed higher so she could catch her breath and stare out the window. Nursing Assessment Including Client Story Mrs. Ross is a previous landowner and farmerââ¬â¢s wife with extensive acreage. Her husband died 2 years ago, and the land was sold. She lives alone in the farmhouse and has help coming in two times a week. As she grew older, she isolated herself in her home and rarely went out. She has had multiple health problems. In her 30s, she attempted suicide and was rescued. She speaks rapidly and seems unable to hold still. Ten years ago, she was diagnosed with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, but she continued to smoke two packs of cigarettes a day. Five years ago, she was diagnosed with heart failure, yet still she continued to smoke. Two years ago, she developed disabling pain in her right foot and leg. She stopped smoking and worked hard to get healthy. Her right foot turned almost black, she could no longer walk, and she agreed to have a femoral-popliteal bypass. After surgery, when the infection set in the leg, she was very angry and sputtered at everyone. She was transferred to the long-term care section of the hospital. Vital signs are: BP 96/62; pulse: 99 to 122 beats per minute and irregular; respirations: 20 breaths per minute. Heart sounds are irregular and distant; peripheral pulses are very weak; dorsalis pedis pulse is present in both legs but weak; lung sounds include wheezes and coarse crackles throughout; and oxygen saturation is 88% to 90%, on oxygen at 3 L. A wound vac is attached to the wound to help close the large opening. Mrs. Ross has not been out of bed for 4 days. She is eating minimally.
Thursday, January 23, 2020
Hawthorne and Young Goodman Brown :: essays research papers fc
It has always appeared to be fact that sin was an easy word to define and that merely doing anything that goes against God and his teachings is a sin. In order to avoid sin, one must possess an infinite amount of faith and be able to follow the teachings of a master that one canââ¬â¢t always see, but needs to understand is always there. In literature, many works have been created dealing with faith and sin, but most are usually not written from a perspective in which a sinning man does not seek redemption. Most stories are not allegories dealing with a man leaving his wife ââ¬â named Faith ââ¬â so that he can go off into the woods and, literally, dance with the devil. Most stories, however, are not Young Goodman Brown and most are not written by Nathaniel Hawthorne as a response to the guilt he felt over being the descendant of people involved in the Salem Witch trials. An immensely important part of this allegory is the character of Faith, Young Goodmanââ¬â¢s wife, wh o represents just what her name says, and how her character affects the entire story. Her existence alone allows for the crisis Young Goodman Brown feels and even later further enhances that same crisis. She is both the cause and solution to all of Brownââ¬â¢s problems, if only he would allow himself to accept his faith rather than enter into the kingdom of the devil. à à à à à à à à à à Faith is a highly subjective thing that all people who wish to have religion in their lives must have and embrace. Now, Hawthorne wrote Young Goodman Brown as a commentary on a seriously religious society that went as far as to drown women who were preported to be witches. As Brown tells his wife that he is going away for a while, she ââ¬â in her pink bows and her young face, implores him not to go. Brown knows that heââ¬â¢s about to embark on a journey where having faith is important and necessary. Even he acknowledges such a fact when he states ââ¬Å"what a wretch am I, to leave her on such an errand.â⬠(Hawthorne 614). Brown is fully aware that on the journey heââ¬â¢s about to embark on, he needs his faith. However, heââ¬â¢s also aware that if he brings his faith along then the meeting with the devil will go differently than planned and will end with him maybe not accepting the devilââ¬â¢s pleas.
Wednesday, January 15, 2020
Mutations Essy
If these genes mutate, then one is considered as having a hereditary risk of breast and ovarian cancer. The BRCAI and BRCA2 mutation means that a woman has an increased risk of breast and/or ovarian cancer before menopause. Sometimes close family members were diagnosed with cancer at an early age also. These harmful mutations also increase the risk of cervical, colon, uterine. stomach, melanoma and gallbladder cancer. There are no standard criteria for who should be tested for the BRCA gene mutation, but if you have family members who have had cancer, It is a deflnlte clue.If any of these family members were young; before menopause, it is a good idea to think about being testing for the ene. It would be a very good idea to ask the family member to test for the BRCA mutation, so that the rest of the family members would know ahead of time also. According the National Cancer Institute, the risk of having the mutation is higher if you are of Ashkenazlc Jewish descent. If this Is the cas e, pay attenuon to If a parent or sibling has been diagnosed with cancer.Also, find out if any grandparents, half- siblings, nieces or nephews had cancer. Pay special attention to relatives that are male, and whether the relative had cancer in both breasts (bilateral breast cancer,) nd a combination of two or more first or second degree relatives diagnosed with ovarian cancer, no matter what their age was when diagnosed. If you have been diagnosed with the BRCAI or BRCA2 gene mutation, you are really in need of support from family and friends.Some people turn to the national advocacy group called Bright Pink. This organization is specifically geared to young women at high risk of breast and ovarian cancer. Many young women are relieved to find out that they are not the only one suffering alone. Having a list of Advocacy groups is lifesaving because once you know; you understand what you must do. The protocol for women with the BRCA mutations is to do nothing until the age of 25 and after that begin a screening regimen between mammograms, ultrasound and a MRI every six months.At age 35 a woman is advised to consider a double mastectomy followed by a complete oophorectomy (removal of one or both ovaries) at age 40. The solution to the BRCAI and BRCA2 gene mutations is hard to do, but you can still live your life after having a mastectomy and an oophorectomy. Most women are done bearing and nursing their children by the time they are in their mid-30's. Mothers then want to be round to raise their children, they want to be around to see their grandchildren born and they want to live their life with their mate.
Tuesday, January 7, 2020
Business Structure and Competitiveness in Brazil - Porters Diamond Model Approach Free Essay Example, 2500 words
Reducing activities that negatively affect the environment is not only beneficial to the company but also is good for the country. For instance, mining companies like Anglo American and Votorantim have incorporated benefits from the ecosystem into the environmental impact assessment process while designing new mines. By learning the impacts of mining on the environment and also how much mining is dependent on the ecosystem, the policymakers can reduce the adverse environmental impacts and also can utilize the advantages of enhanced environmental management. Some of the opportunities include diminishing greenhouse gas emissions and functional costs of mining, while also giving scope for income generation and development in the region (Ranganathan, 2013). Porter s Diamond Model In this era of globalization, competition between industries plays a significant role in establishing a country in the global arena. Porter s Diamond Model explains how firms create and sustain competitive adv antage in global industries (Porter, 2011, Ch. 3). The Diamond Model establishes a link between a firm and a particular country s source of competitive advantages, and how the firm utilizes the advantages to acquire an international competitive advantage. We will write a custom essay sample on Business Structure and Competitiveness in Brazil - Porters Diamond Model Approach or any topic specifically for you Only $17.96 $11.86/page
Sunday, December 29, 2019
Using Multiple Main Classes in Java
Normally at the outset of learning the Java programming language, there will be a number of code examples that are useful to compile and run to fully understand them. When using an IDE like NetBeans its easy to fall into the trap of creating a new project every time for each new piece of code. However, it can all happen in one project. Creating a Code Example Project A NetBeans project contains the classes needed to build a Java application. The application uses the main class as the starting point for the execution of the Java code. In fact, in a new Java application project created by NetBeans only one class included - the main class contained within the Main.java file. Go ahead and make a new project in NetBeans and called it CodeExamples. Lets say I want to try programming some Java code to output the result of adding 2 2. Put the following code into the main method: public static void main(String[] args) {int result 2 2;System.out.println(result);} When the application is compiled and executed the output printed is 4. Now, if I want to try out another piece of Java code I have two choices, I can either overwrite the code in the main class or I can put it in another main class. Multiple Main Classes NetBeans projects can have more than one main class and its easy to specify the main class an application should run. This allows a programmer to switch between any number of main classes within the same application. Only the code in one of the main classes will be executed, effectively making each class independent of each other. Note: This is not usual in a standard Java application. All it needs is one main class as a starting point for the execution of the code. Remember this is a tip for running multiple code examples within one project. Lets add a new main class to the CodeSnippets project. From the File menu choose New File. In the New File wizard pick the Java Main Class file type (its in the Java category). Click Next. Name the file example1 and click Finish. In the example1 class add the following code to the main method: public static void main(String[] args) {System.out.println(Four);} Now, compile and run the application. The output will still be 4. This is because the project is still set up to use the Main class as its main class. To change the main class being used, go to the File menu and choose Project Properties. This dialog gives all the options that can be changed in a NetBeans project. Click on the Run category. On this page, there is a Main-Class option. Currently, it is set to codeexamples.Main (i.e., the Main.java class). By clicking the Browse button to the right, a pop-up window will appear with all the main classes that are in the CodeExamples project. Choose codeexamples.example1 and click Select Main Class. Click OK on the Project Properties dialog. Compile and run the application again. The output will now be four because the main class being used is now example1.java. Using this approach its easy to try out lots of different Java code examples and keep them all in one NetBeans project. but still be able to compile and run them independent of each other.
Saturday, December 21, 2019
Comparison of Temptation in Macbeth and A Simple Plan
William Shakespeare once stated, ââ¬Å"Temptation is the fire that brings up the scum of the heart.â⬠(William Shakespeare) Although slightly bleak, many works of art have this similar idea. Through this, similarities are found concerning aspects of each work. Differences occur in the protagonistââ¬â¢s own personal journey on the path of temptation. Undeniably, this parallel is found within William Shakespeareââ¬â¢s own infamous play, Macbeth and the two-time Oscar- winning film, A Simple Plan. Macbeth is fighting for the honor of kingship even though he is not liable to inherit the crown and only becomes acquainted with the idea through a prophecy of three witches. Hank Mitchell, the protagonist of the movie, is presented with 4.4 million dollars in anâ⬠¦show more contentâ⬠¦Heedless and slightly more arrogant Macbeth uses the three witchesââ¬â¢ prophetic statements that he cannot be harmed proved to be his disadvantage. Perhaps ignorance is why in the end Macdu ff detects Macbethââ¬â¢s scheme. According to the witchesââ¬â¢ statement, Macbeth cannot be harmed by any man born of a woman. Macduff defies this statement by being born of c-section and not traditional birth. Hank also demonstrates to be ignorant. For some reason, he is coaxed into thinking that if he moves away with the money, no one can ever find out. When the ââ¬Å"F.B.Iâ⬠agent shows up about a missing plane, Hank finds out he is the brother of the pilot and the plane was delivering ransom money. The money was marked and therefore, unusable. The ending scene is Hank burning the money. Despite the temptation, Hank and Macbeth could have still lived average lives but decided to let greed overcome them and ended up losing it all in the end anyway. Although Macbeth and A Simple Plan contain similarities in their stories, they each have differences in various aspects. Hank and Macbeth experienced a change of character for different reasons. Macbeth is thinking of his own self more than anyone else. With him receiving crown will give him majority of all power. Although his wife will serve as queen and have joint rule, Macbethââ¬â¢s reign would always succeed. He ignores his wife when she advises him to just to glorify in his new crown and stop all the murdering. Yet Macbeth appears to beShow MoreRelatedEssay A Comparison of Macbeth and Hamlet2672 Words à |à 11 PagesA Comparison of Macbeth and Hamlet MACBETH stands in contrast throughout with Hamlet; in the manner of opening more especially. In the latter, there is a gradual ascent from the simplest forms of conversation to the language of impassioned intellect,ââ¬âyet
Friday, December 13, 2019
The Host Chapter 41 Vanished Free Essays
Ian sat with me for three days in the darkness. He left for only a few short minutes at a time, to get us food and water. At first, Ian ate, though I did not. We will write a custom essay sample on The Host Chapter 41: Vanished or any similar topic only for you Order Now Then, as he realized that it wasnââ¬â¢t a loss of appetite that left my tray full, he stopped eating, too. I used his brief absences to deal with the physical needs that I could not ignore, thankful for the proximity of the odorous stream. As my fast lengthened, those needs vanished. I couldnââ¬â¢t keep from sleeping, but I did not make myself comfortable. The first day, I woke to find my head and shoulders cradled on his lap. I recoiled from him, shuddering so violently that he did not repeat the gesture. After that, I slumped against the stones where I was, and when I woke, I would curl back up into my silent ball at once. ââ¬Å"Please,â⬠Ian whispered on the third day-at least I thought it was the third day; there was no way to be sure of the passing time in this dark, silent place. It was the first time heââ¬â¢d spoken. I knew a tray of food was in front of me. He pushed it closer, till it touched my leg. I cringed away. ââ¬Å"Please, Wanda. Please eat something.â⬠He put his hand on my arm but moved away quickly when I flinched out from under it. ââ¬Å"Please donââ¬â¢t hate me. Iââ¬â¢m so sorry. If Iââ¬â¢d knownâ⬠¦ I would have stopped them. I wonââ¬â¢t let it happen again.â⬠He would never stop them. He was just one among many. And, as Jared had said, heââ¬â¢d had no objections before. I was the enemy. Even in the most compassionate, humankindââ¬â¢s limited scope of mercy was reserved for their own. I knew Doc could never intentionally inflict pain on another person. I doubted he would even be capable of watching such a thing, tender as his feelings were. But a worm, a centipede? Why would he care about the agony of a strange alien creature? Why would it bother him to murder a baby-slowly, slicing it apart piece by piece-if it had no human mouth to scream with? ââ¬Å"I should have told you,â⬠Ian whispered. Would it have mattered if Iââ¬â¢d simply been told rather than having seen the tortured remains for myself? Would the pain be less strong? ââ¬Å"Please eat.â⬠The silence returned. We sat in it for a while, maybe another hour. Ian got up and walked quietly away. I could make no sense of my emotions. In that moment, I hated the body I was bound to. How did it make sense that his going depressed me? Why should it pain me to have the solitude I craved? I wanted the monster back, and that was plainly wrong. I wasnââ¬â¢t alone for long. I didnââ¬â¢t know if Ian had gone to get him or if heââ¬â¢d been waiting for Ian to leave, but I recognized Jebââ¬â¢s contemplative whistle as it approached in the darkness. The whistling stopped a few feet from me, and there was a loud click. A beam of yellow light burned my eyes. I blinked against it. Jeb set the flashlight down, bulb up. It threw a circle of light on the low ceiling and made a wider, more diffuse sphere of light around us. Jeb settled himself against the wall beside me. ââ¬Å"Gonna starve yourself, then? Is that the plan?â⬠I glared at the stone floor. If I was being honest with myself, I knew that my mourning was over. I had grieved. I hadnââ¬â¢t known the child or the other soul in the cave of horrors. I could not grieve for strangers forever. No, now I was angry. ââ¬Å"You wanna die, there are easier and faster ways.â⬠As if I wasnââ¬â¢t aware of that. ââ¬Å"So give me to Doc, then,â⬠I croaked. Jeb wasnââ¬â¢t surprised to hear me speak. He nodded to himself, as if this was exactly what heââ¬â¢d known would come out of my mouth. ââ¬Å"Did you expect us to just give up, Wanderer?â⬠Jebââ¬â¢s voice was stern and more serious than I had ever heard it before. ââ¬Å"We have a stronger survival instinct than that. Of course we want to find a way to get our minds back. It could be any one of us someday. So many people we love are already lost. ââ¬Å"It isnââ¬â¢t easy. It nearly kills Doc each time he fails-youââ¬â¢ve seen that. But this is our reality, Wanda. This is our world. Weââ¬â¢ve lost a war. We are about to be extinct. Weââ¬â¢re trying to find ways to save ourselves.â⬠For the first time, Jeb spoke to me as if I were a soul and not a human. I had a sense that the distinction had always been clear to him, though. He was just a courteous monster. I couldnââ¬â¢t deny the truth of what he was saying, or the sense of it. The shock had worn off, and I was myself again. It was in my nature to be fair. Some few of these humans could see my side of things; Ian, at least. Then I, too, could consider their perspective. They were monsters, but maybe monsters who were justified in what they were doing. Of course they would think violence was the answer. They wouldnââ¬â¢t be able to imagine any other solution. Could I blame them that their genetic programming restricted their problem-solving abilities in this way? I cleared my throat, but my voice was still hoarse with disuse. ââ¬Å"Hacking up babies wonââ¬â¢t save anyone, Jeb. Now theyââ¬â¢re all dead.â⬠He was quiet for a moment. ââ¬Å"We canââ¬â¢t tell your young from your old.â⬠ââ¬Å"No, I know that.â⬠ââ¬Å"Your kind donââ¬â¢t spare our babies.â⬠ââ¬Å"We donââ¬â¢t torture them, though. We never intentionally cause anyone pain.â⬠ââ¬Å"You do worse than that. You erase them.â⬠ââ¬Å"You do both.â⬠ââ¬Å"We do, yes-because we have to try. We have to keep fighting. Itââ¬â¢s the only way we know. Itââ¬â¢s keep trying or turn our faces to the wall and die.â⬠He raised one eyebrow at me. That must have been what it looked like I was doing. I sighed and took the water bottle Ian had left close to my foot. I drained it in one long pull, and then cleared my throat again. ââ¬Å"It will never work, Jeb. You can keep cutting us out in pieces, but youââ¬â¢ll just murder more and more sentient creatures of both species. We do not willingly kill, but our bodies are not weak, either. Our attachments may look like soft silver hair, but theyââ¬â¢re stronger than your organs. Thatââ¬â¢s whatââ¬â¢s happening, isnââ¬â¢t it? Doc slices up my family, and their limbs shred through the brains of yours.â⬠ââ¬Å"Like cottage cheese,â⬠he agreed. I gagged and then shuddered at the image. ââ¬Å"It makes me sick, too,â⬠he admitted. ââ¬Å"Doc gets real bent out of shape. Every time he thinks heââ¬â¢s got it cracked, it goes south again. Heââ¬â¢s tried everything he can think of, but he canââ¬â¢t save them from getting turned into oatmeal. Your souls donââ¬â¢t respond to injected sedationâ⬠¦ or poison.â⬠My voice came out rough with new horror. ââ¬Å"Of course not. Our chemical makeup is completely different.â⬠ââ¬Å"Once, one of yours seemed to guess what was going to happen. Before Doc could knock the human out, the silver thingy tore up his brain from the inside. Course, we didnââ¬â¢t know that until Doc opened him up. The guy just collapsed.â⬠I was surprised, strangely impressed. That soul must have been very brave. I had not had the courage to take that step, even in the beginning when I was sure they were going to try to torture this very information from me. I didnââ¬â¢t imagine they would try to slash the answer out for themselves; that course was so obviously doomed to failure, it had never occurred to me. ââ¬Å"Jeb, we are relatively tiny creatures, utterly dependent on unwilling hosts. We wouldnââ¬â¢t have lasted very long if we didnââ¬â¢t have some defenses.â⬠ââ¬Å"Iââ¬â¢m not denying that your kind have a right to those defenses. Iââ¬â¢m just telling you that weââ¬â¢re gonna keep fighting back, however we can. We donââ¬â¢t mean to cause anyone pain. Weââ¬â¢re makinââ¬â¢ this up as we go. But we will keep fighting.â⬠We looked at each other. ââ¬Å"Then maybe you should have Doc slice me up. What else am I good for?â⬠ââ¬Å"Now, now. Donââ¬â¢t be silly, Wanda. We humans arenââ¬â¢t so logical as all that. We have a greater range of good and bad in us than you do. Well, maybe mostly the bad.â⬠I nodded at that, but he kept going, ignoring me. ââ¬Å"We value the individual. We probably put too much emphasis on the individual, if it comes right down to it. How many people, in the abstract, wouldâ⬠¦ letââ¬â¢s say Paigeâ⬠¦ how many people would she sacrifice to keep Andy alive? The answer wouldnââ¬â¢t make any sense if you were looking at the whole of humanity as equals. ââ¬Å"The way you are valued hereâ⬠¦ Well, that donââ¬â¢t make much sense when you look at it from humanityââ¬â¢s perspective, either. But thereââ¬â¢s some who would value you above a human stranger. Have to admit, I put myself in that group. I count you as a friend, Wanda. Course, thatââ¬â¢s not gonna work well if you hate me.â⬠ââ¬Å"I donââ¬â¢t hate you, Jeb. Butâ⬠¦Ã¢â¬ ââ¬Å"Yeah?â⬠ââ¬Å"I just donââ¬â¢t see how I can live here anymore. Not if youââ¬â¢re going to be slaughtering my family in the other room. And I canââ¬â¢t leave, obviously. So you see what I mean? What else is there for me but Docââ¬â¢s pointless cutting?â⬠I shuddered. He nodded seriously. ââ¬Å"Now, thatââ¬â¢s a real valid point. Itââ¬â¢s not fair to ask you to live with that.â⬠My stomach dropped. ââ¬Å"If I get a choice, Iââ¬â¢d rather you shot me, actually,â⬠I whispered. Jeb laughed. ââ¬Å"Slow down there, honey. Nobodyââ¬â¢s shooting my friends, or hackinââ¬â¢ ââ¬Ë em up. I know youââ¬â¢re not lying, Wanda. If you say doing it our way isnââ¬â¢t going to work, then weââ¬â¢re going to have to rethink things. Iââ¬â¢ll tell the boys theyââ¬â¢re not to bring any more souls back for now. Besides, I think Docââ¬â¢s nerves are toast. He canââ¬â¢t take much more of this.â⬠ââ¬Å"You could be lying to me,â⬠I reminded him. ââ¬Å"I probably couldnââ¬â¢t tell.â⬠ââ¬Å"Youââ¬â¢ll have to trust me, then. Because Iââ¬â¢m not going to shoot you. And Iââ¬â¢m not going to let you starve yourself, either. Eat something, kid. Thatââ¬â¢s an order.â⬠I took a deep breath, trying to think. I wasnââ¬â¢t sure if weââ¬â¢d come to an accommodation or not. Nothing made sense in this body. I liked the people here too much. They were friends. Monstrous friends that I couldnââ¬â¢t see in the proper light while sunk in emotion. Jeb picked up a thick square of cornbread soaked through with stolen honey and shoved it into my hand. It made a mess there, crumbling into gluey morsels that stuck to my fingers. I sighed again and started cleaning them off with my tongue. ââ¬Å"Thatââ¬â¢s a girl! Weââ¬â¢ll get over this rough spot. Things are gonna work out here, youââ¬â¢ll see. Try to think positive.â⬠ââ¬Å"Think positive,â⬠I mumbled around a mouthful of food, shaking my head with disbelief. Only Jebâ⬠¦ Ian came back then. When he walked into our circle of light and saw the food in my hand, the look that spread across his face filled me with guilt. It was a look of joyous relief. No, I had never intentionally caused anyone physical pain, but I had hurt Ian deeply enough just by hurting myself. Human lives were so impossibly tangled. What a mess. ââ¬Å"Here you are, Jeb,â⬠he said in a subdued voice as he sat down across from us, just slightly closer to Jeb. ââ¬Å"Jared guessed you might be here.â⬠I dragged myself half a foot toward him, my arms aching from being motionless so long, and put my hand on his. ââ¬Å"Sorry,â⬠I whispered. He turned his hand up to hold mine. ââ¬Å"Donââ¬â¢t apologize to me.â⬠ââ¬Å"I should have known. Jebââ¬â¢s right. Of course you fight back. How can I blame you for that?â⬠ââ¬Å"Itââ¬â¢s different with you here. It should have stopped.â⬠But my being here had only made it that much more important to solve the problem. How to rip me out and keep Melanie here. How to erase me to bring her back. ââ¬Å"Allââ¬â¢s fair in war,â⬠I murmured, trying to smile. He grinned weakly back. ââ¬Å"And love. You forgot that part.â⬠ââ¬Å"Okay, break it up,â⬠Jeb mumbled. ââ¬Å"Iââ¬â¢m not done here.â⬠I looked at him curiously. What more was there? ââ¬Å"Now.â⬠He took a deep breath. ââ¬Å"Try not to freak out again, okay?â⬠he asked, looking at me. I froze, gripping Ianââ¬â¢s hand tighter. Ian threw an anxious glance at Jeb. ââ¬Å"Youââ¬â¢re going to tell her?â⬠Ian asked. ââ¬Å"What now?â⬠I gasped. ââ¬Å"What is it now?â⬠Jeb had his poker face on. ââ¬Å"Itââ¬â¢s Jamie.â⬠Those two words turned the world upside down again. For three long days, Iââ¬â¢d been Wanderer, a soul among humans. I was suddenly Wanda again, a very confused soul with human emotions that were too powerful to control. I jumped to my feet-yanking Ian up with me, my hand locked on his like a vise-and then swayed, my head spinning. ââ¬Å"Sheesh. I said donââ¬â¢t freak out, Wanda. Jamieââ¬â¢s okay. Heââ¬â¢s just really anxious about you. He heard what happened, and heââ¬â¢s been asking for you-worried out of his mind, that kid is-and I donââ¬â¢t think itââ¬â¢s good for him. I came down here to ask you to go see him. But you canââ¬â¢t go like this. You look horrible. It will just upset him for no good reason. Sit down and eat some more food.â⬠ââ¬Å"His leg?â⬠I demanded. ââ¬Å"Thereââ¬â¢s a little infection,â⬠Ian murmured. ââ¬Å"Doc wants him to stay down or heââ¬â¢d have come to get you a long time ago. If Jared wasnââ¬â¢t practically pinning him to the bed, he would have come anyway.â⬠Jeb nodded. ââ¬Å"Jared almost came here and carried you out by force, but I told him to let me speak to you first. It wouldnââ¬â¢t do the kid any good to see you catatonic.â⬠My blood felt as though it had changed into ice water. Surely just my imagination. ââ¬Å"Whatââ¬â¢s being done?â⬠Jeb shrugged. ââ¬Å"Nothinââ¬â¢ to do. Kidââ¬â¢s strong; heââ¬â¢ll fight it off.â⬠ââ¬Å"Nothing to do? What do you mean?â⬠ââ¬Å"Itââ¬â¢s a bacterial infection,â⬠Ian said. ââ¬Å"We donââ¬â¢t have antibiotics anymore.â⬠ââ¬Å"Because they donââ¬â¢t work-the bacteria are smarter than your medicines. There has to be something better, something else.â⬠ââ¬Å"Well, we donââ¬â¢t have anything else,â⬠Jeb said. ââ¬Å"Heââ¬â¢s a healthy kid. It just has to run its course.â⬠ââ¬Å"Runâ⬠¦ itsâ⬠¦ course.â⬠I murmured the words in a daze. ââ¬Å"Eat something,â⬠Ian urged. ââ¬Å"Youââ¬â¢ll worry him if he sees you like this.â⬠I rubbed my eyes, trying to think straight. Jamie was sick. There was nothing to treat him with here. No options but waiting to see if his body could heal itself. And if it couldnââ¬â¢tâ⬠¦ ââ¬Å"No,â⬠I gasped. I felt as if I were standing on the edge of Walterââ¬â¢s grave again, listening to the sound of sand falling into the darkness. ââ¬Å"No,â⬠I moaned, fighting against the memory. I turned mechanically and started walking with stiff strides toward the exit. ââ¬Å"Wait,â⬠Ian said, but he didnââ¬â¢t pull against the hand he still held. He kept pace with me. Jeb caught up to me on the other side and shoved more food into my free hand. ââ¬Å"Eat for the kidââ¬â¢s sake,â⬠he said. I bit into it without tasting, chewed without thinking, swallowed without feeling the food go down. ââ¬Å"Knew she was gonna overreact,â⬠Jeb grumbled. ââ¬Å"So why did you tell her?â⬠Ian asked, frustrated. Jeb didnââ¬â¢t answer. I wondered why he didnââ¬â¢t. Was this worse even than I imagined? ââ¬Å"Is he in the hospital?â⬠I asked in an emotionless, inflectionless voice. ââ¬Å"No, no,â⬠Ian assured me quickly. ââ¬Å"Heââ¬â¢s in your room.â⬠I didnââ¬â¢t even feel relief. Too numb for that. I would have gone into that room again for Jamie, even if it was still reeking of blood. I didnââ¬â¢t see the familiar caves I walked through. I barely noticed that it was day. I couldnââ¬â¢t meet the eyes of any of the humans who stopped to stare at me. I could only put one foot in front of the other until I finally reached the hallway. There were a few people clustered in front of the seventh cave. The silk screen was pushed far aside, and they craned their necks to see into Jaredââ¬â¢s room. They were all familiar, people Iââ¬â¢d considered friends. Jamieââ¬â¢s friends, too. Why were they here? Was his condition so unstable that they needed to check on him often? ââ¬Å"Wanda,â⬠someone said. Heidi. ââ¬Å"Wandaââ¬â¢s here.â⬠ââ¬Å"Let her through,â⬠Wes said. He slapped Jeb on the back. ââ¬Å"Good job.â⬠I walked through the little group without looking at them. They parted for me; I might have walked right into them if they hadnââ¬â¢t. I couldnââ¬â¢t concentrate on anything but moving myself forward. It was bright in the high-ceilinged room. The room itself was not crowded. Doc or Jared had kept everyone out. I was vaguely aware of Jared, leaning against the far wall with his hands clasped behind him-a posture he assumed only when he was really worried. Doc knelt beside the big bed where Jamie lay, just where I had left him. Why had I left him? Jamieââ¬â¢s face was red and sweaty. The right leg of his jeans had been cut away, and the bandage was peeled back from his wound. It wasnââ¬â¢t as big as Iââ¬â¢d expected. Not as horrible as I would have imagined. Just a two-inch gash with smooth edges. But the edges were a frightening shade of red, and the skin around the cut was swollen and shiny. ââ¬Å"Wanda,â⬠Jamie exhaled when he saw me. ââ¬Å"Oh, youââ¬â¢re okay. Oh.â⬠He took a deep breath. I stumbled and fell to my knees beside him, dragging Ian down with me. I touched Jamieââ¬â¢s face and felt the skin burn under my hand. My elbow brushed Docââ¬â¢s, but I barely noticed. He scooted away, but I didnââ¬â¢t look to see what emotion was on his face, whether it was aversion or guilt. ââ¬Å"Jamie, baby, how are you?â⬠ââ¬Å"Stupid,â⬠he said, grinning. ââ¬Å"Just plain stupid. Can you believe this?â⬠He gestured to his leg. ââ¬Å"Of all the luck.â⬠I found a wet rag on his pillow and wiped it across his forehead. ââ¬Å"Youââ¬â¢re going to be fine,â⬠I promised. I was surprised at how fierce my voice sounded. ââ¬Å"Of course. Itââ¬â¢s nothing. But Jared wouldnââ¬â¢t let me come talk to you.â⬠His face was suddenly anxious. ââ¬Å"I heard aboutâ⬠¦ and Wanda, you know I -ââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"Shh. Donââ¬â¢t even think of it. If Iââ¬â¢d had any idea you were sick I would have been here sooner.â⬠ââ¬Å"Iââ¬â¢m not really sick. Just a stupid infection. Iââ¬â¢m glad youââ¬â¢re here, though. I hated not knowing how you were.â⬠I couldnââ¬â¢t swallow down the lump in my throat. Monster? My Jamie? Never. ââ¬Å"So I heard you schooled Wes the day we got back,â⬠Jamie said, changing the subject with a wide grin. ââ¬Å"Man, I wish I could have seen that! I bet Melanie loved it.â⬠ââ¬Å"Yes, she did.â⬠ââ¬Å"She okay? Not too worried?â⬠ââ¬Å"Of course sheââ¬â¢s worried,â⬠I murmured, watching the cloth travel across his forehead as if it were someone elseââ¬â¢s hand moving it. Melanie. Where was she? I searched through my head for her familiar voice. There was nothing but silence. Why wasnââ¬â¢t she here? Jamieââ¬â¢s skin was burning where my fingers brushed it. The feel of it-that unwholesome heat-should have had her in the same panic I was feeling. ââ¬Å"You okay?â⬠Jamie asked. ââ¬Å"Wanda?â⬠ââ¬Å"Iââ¬â¢mâ⬠¦ tired. Jamie, Iââ¬â¢m sorry. Iââ¬â¢m justâ⬠¦ out of it.â⬠He eyed me carefully. ââ¬Å"You donââ¬â¢t look so good.â⬠What had I done? ââ¬Å"I havenââ¬â¢t cleaned up in a while.â⬠ââ¬Å"Iââ¬â¢m fine, you know. You should go eat or something. Youââ¬â¢re pale.â⬠ââ¬Å"Donââ¬â¢t worry about me.â⬠ââ¬Å"Iââ¬â¢ll get you some food,â⬠Ian said. ââ¬Å"You hungry, kid?â⬠ââ¬Å"Ahâ⬠¦ no, not really.â⬠My eyes flashed back to Jamie. Jamie was always hungry. ââ¬Å"Send someone else,â⬠I told Ian, gripping his hand tighter. ââ¬Å"Sure.â⬠His face was smooth, but I could sense both surprise and worry. ââ¬Å"Wes, could you get some food? Something for Jamie, too. Iââ¬â¢m sure heââ¬â¢ll find that appetite by the time you get back.â⬠I measured Jamieââ¬â¢s face. He was flushed, but his eyes were bright. He would be okay for a few minutes if I left him here. ââ¬Å"Jamie, do you mind if I go wash my face? I feel sort ofâ⬠¦ grimy.â⬠He frowned at the false note in my voice. ââ¬Å"Course not.â⬠I pulled Ian up with me again as I rose. ââ¬Å"Iââ¬â¢ll be right back. I mean it this time.â⬠He smiled at my weak joke. I felt someoneââ¬â¢s eyes on me as I left the room. Jaredââ¬â¢s or Docââ¬â¢s, I didnââ¬â¢t know. I didnââ¬â¢t care. Only Jeb still stood in the hallway now; the others had gone, reassured, perhaps, that Jamie was doing okay. Jebââ¬â¢s head tilted to the side, curious, as he tried to figure out what I was doing. He was surprised to see me leave Jamieââ¬â¢s side so soon and so abruptly. He, too, had heard the sham in my excuse. I hurried past his inquisitive gaze, towing Ian with me. I dragged Ian back through the room where the tunnels to all the living quarters met in a big tangle of openings. Instead of keeping on toward the main plaza, I pulled him into one of the dark corridors, picking at random. It was deserted. ââ¬Å"Wanda, what -ââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"I need you to help me, Ian.â⬠My voice was strained, frantic. ââ¬Å"Whatever you need. You know that.â⬠I put my hands on either side of his face, staring into his eyes. I could barely see a glint of their blue in the darkness. ââ¬Å"I need you to kiss me, Ian. Now. Please.â⬠How to cite The Host Chapter 41: Vanished, Essay examples
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)